If you’re a fan of Comedy Central’s Daily Show, you’ll be interested in today’s top pick, OMG: How I Created the Universe, Adam, and Steve. The humor book was written by 12-time Emmy-winning comedy writer David Javerbaum (who credits God with co-authorship of the book). David was head writer for the Daily Show for four years before taking over as executive producer in 2006.
David was one of three principal authors of the Daily Show’s textbook parody America (The Book): A Citizen’s Guide to Democracy Inaction, which sold 2.6 million copies and won the 2005 Thurber Prize for American Humor. He was lead writer on that book’s sequel, Earth (The Book): A Visitor’s Guide to the Human Race; his co-production of its audiobook earned the 2011 Grammy Award for Best Spoken-Word Album.
David left the show in July 2010, but fortunately hasn’t slowed his creative output. He’s been writing books and also working as a musical-theater lyricist and librettist who won the $100,000 Ed Kleban Award for Outstanding Lyrics in 2005. He co-wrote the opening to the 65th Tony Awards, “Broadway: It’s Not Just for Gays Anymore,” which earned him his twelfth Emmy (and first apart from The Daily Show) last year for Outstanding Music and Lyrics.
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In the ultimate celebrity memoir, The Last Testament, the Lord our God, King of the Universe, is ready to telleth-all. In the meantime, enjoy this freebie from God: OMG: How I Created the Universe, Adam, and Steve, which contains the first five chapters on the Creation of Adam and Steve (you read correctly) excerpted from The Last Testament.
Over the course of his long and distinguished career, god has literally seen it all. And not just seen. In fact, the multi-talented deity has played a pivotal role in many major events, including the Creation of the universe, the entirety of world history, the life of every human being who has ever lived, and the successful transitioning of American Idol into the post–Simon Cowell era.
Now, as the earth he has godded so magnificently draws to a Mayan-induced close, God breaks his 1,400-year literary silence with his final masterpiece,The Last Testament.
As dictated to his mortal amanuensis, 11-time Emmy Award–winning comedy writer David Javerbaum, God looks back with unprecedented candor on his time in the public sector. He takes us behind the scenes of Genesis, setting the record (un)straight on the real first couple, Adam and Steve, and challenging long-held notions about the viability of containing a phylogenetically complete double bestiary within a 450,000-cubic-cubit watercraft. For the first time, he breaks his silence on Jesus Christ, shedding light on a father-son relationship as heartwarming as Will and Jaden Smith’s. And he reveals his true feelings about his third great faith, Islam, WHICH ARE NOTHING BUT POSITIVE AND RESPECTFUL.
But The Last Testament doesn’t just look back. It also offers God’s perspectives on the perennial quagmires of love, marriage, and smiting. And he takes an 27.99 unfiltered look at contemporary society, addressing such hot-button topics as:
• Why he loves America
• What he listens for in a good prayer
• Which sports teams he really roots for
• Which celebrities are totally gay
Sometimes preachy, sometimes holier-than-thou, but always lively, The Last Testament is a tale of courage, adversity, and triumph. It’s the ultimate celebrity autobiography, sure to appeal to not only hardcore God fans and “worshipers,” but to anyone who’s ever had total omnipotence. If you place complete faith in the literal truth of one book written by God, make it The Last Testament.
Sebastian DelaCourte has lived centuries, always seeking, wondering about the woman who made him vampire. He desires love. He needs blood. Scarlet Rose captures his heart, and promises love—but not without forcing the two to face the twisted fate of time and undying passion.
A macabre paranormal romance featuring vampires, time-travel, an angry ghost, and rock ‘n roll. Set in contemporary Los Angeles and 18th century Paris. This is the first authorized digital edition of Dark Rapture. This version also includes the sequel Wicked Angels.
A Romance Writers of America RITA Award finalist.
When Michael Kilbride, a handsome man with a dark past, arrives in the Irish village of Ballymuir, rumors begin to fly. While many turn against him, one woman steps forward–the village’s beloved schoolteacher, Kylie O’Shea. Kylie’s friends have long believed that proper Kylie is bound to fulfill the local legend of being the last bride in Ballymuir. But sparks soon ignite between Michael and Kylie. Will Kylie, who also hides secrets, find the courage to confront her past and claim passion as her own?
Victor Barboza is a man who has everything but a good woman.
Cara Green has a young son, three part-time jobs, and a few extra pounds.
Their worlds collide as Cara serves Victor at an upscale party in Manhattan, upsetting Victor’s ex-fiancee, Alexis, in the process.
Victor pursues Cara, but Cara is not sure of his intentions: Is he using her to make Alexis jealous? Does he just want her for sex? Or is love Victor’s true aim?
Florida heat is murder – and the bodies are stacking up at an alarming rate. From the moment Probation Officer Jo Cazimer witnesses a murder her life is in jeopardy. Working with her best friend Detective Kate Snow they struggle to identify the killer. But in Florida the snakes slither, the gators are hungry and a serial killer is on the loose.
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Eleven years before they were framed for the murder of a king, before even assuming the title of Riyria, Royce Melborn and Hadrian Blackwater were practically strangers. Unlikely associates, this cynical thief and idealist swordsman, were just learning how to work together as a team. In this standalone first installment of The Riyria Chronicles, Royce is determined to teach his naive partner a lesson about good deeds.
Life was good for F.B.I. Agent #7 Bentley Clanton. He had the job of his dreams and partnered with his best friend, Aiden Davenport. Together, they had been working to arrest the infamous arms dealer, Maurice “Tombstone” Larson. Unfortunately, things went bad leaving Bentley shot.
Arriving in Heaven before his time, he is escorted to the Returns Department. He meets his Guardian Angel, Faith Fullilove. She promises that she’ll be on earth when he “returns.” She can’t tell him what form he will take. The last thing he thinks is that his new life will consist of him having two long ears, giant paws, four stubby legs, and a tail.
He is teamed with three other Returns, a fun loving Golden Retriever, a feisty Chihuahua, and a flamboyant West Highland Terrier. They sniff out the trail of his nemesis, Tombstone Larson, during Mardi Gras season. When their investigation draws the attention of his former partner, Aiden travels to uncover what is really going on in the Crescent City of New Orleans. What happens when they meet face to snout?
A 200-mile labyrinth of dark storm drains serves as refuge for the delusional stalker who will go to any lengths to possess fragile, emotionally isolated Emilie Davis. To survive, Emilie will have to confront the secrets of her past she has kept locked away from everyone, including herself.
Emilie is a master escape artist—she’s fled a manipulative mother and a controlling ex-husband. But it’s impossible to evade a stalker who uses a bank robbery as a ruse to kidnap her. He’s still out there, hiding in the Las Vegas tunnels and dodging police. Emilie’s life careens out of control as her assailant continues his pursuit. She has nowhere to turn but to Nathan Madigan, the hostage negotiator who worked the robbery.
Falling in love, baking a magical cake, fighting an evil necromancer–it’s all in a day’s work for Audrey Oliver, seventeen-year-old witch-in-training. When her mother goes missing and her mysterious “cousin” shows up out of the blue, Audrey knows something’s gone horribly, dangerously wrong. Now it’s up to her to get her own magical powers up to speed before everyone she loves is destroyed by the sorcerer intricately connected to her mother’s secret past.
Through determination and hard work, Troy Mulligan had become the man he always wanted to be. He is happy, healthy, has a wonderful family and successful career. A surprise inheritance helps enlighten him to the prospect that the basic measure of the United States economy, the dollar itself, is unstable and dangerous. As the industry which he works becomes more and more oppressive through government over-regulation, he decides to change his life’s path and focus on helping people instead.
When a billionaire approaches him with an idea to start a new global currency based on precious metals, he jumps at the chance to help, feeling that he will be improving the lives of people who don’t necessarily understand the danger they are facing under the current monetary system. However, introducing sound money to the world economy has far deeper implications to its’ power structure, and Troy is about to find out what lengths some will go to preserve it.
Liam Swift is a young man Amy has always admired from afar. She’s seen his face a thousand times; on the screen and in magazines. He seems unstoppable as his talent and beauty send him hurtling toward becoming a Hollywood legend…
Until one day – in what appears to be a fit of madness – he stuns the world by throwing it all away. Not even the most persistent reporter can fathom the reason behind Liam’s decision.
Never in Amy’s wildest dreams could she have imagined this God of acting would go on to accept employment at her local boarding school. Or that he’d personally start teaching her drama lessons.
It seems life can’t get much better for Amy … until the sound of tortured weeping starts echoing through the thin walls of her dorm room each night, leading her to stumble upon a horrifying secret Liam had hoped to keep hidden forever.
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Madeleine Toche races to the front only to find her brother mortally wounded during the German Blitzkrieg attack on France at the outset of World War II. His death and her rape at the hands of an SS Stormtrooper cast Madeleine down a path of death and violence as her desire for revenge reaches a crescendo.
An orphan at the age of seven, there was one thing that Sienna Richards didn’t do easily–give her heart. She made that mistake once by trusting and giving her heart to her childhood best friend and ex-boyfriend, Kyle Matthews. When Sienna left for London to study, she was taken aback when Kyle told her that he’s been seeing someone else.
Hurt and betrayed, Sienna decided to fly back to LA to confront him. The whole idea of “closure” was definitely a bad idea. She immediately left, deflated and aggrieved. Back in London, Sienna was surprised when her very good friend, the magnetic Blake Knightly, seemed to be determined to have her. Blake was relentless but will not settle until he gets ALL of Sienna.
Women clamored to be the handsome aristocratic Blake. Who could possibly resist a compelling man that drew such power and commanded attention by simply just breathing?
An epic journey, which will test a young woman’s will to survive and lead her into the arms of destiny.
… See the rest of today’s Editor’s Picks and the Kindle Daily Deal here on page 2